Conan the Destroyer

Conan does The Hidden Fortress, while being driven by a girl, and hearing the lamentations of that woman.

The quest is simple: escort some lightweight chick to get some McGuffin somewhere, and the queen will resurrect Conan’s girl that died the last time. Conan jumps to the occasion.

That chick is a brat, so Conan disregards her and gathers his party. There’s already a rogue and a barbarian, we’re still missing a mage. The same guy from last time is saved from cannibals. There’s also Zula, another damage dealer that joins them by chance.

What Conan doesn’t know is that the queen sent her praetorian guard to follow them, and their chief of the guard in the party to save the most precious cargo: the chick’s virginity. That is in peril, since Conan’s muscles are in full display.

It’s urgent to resurrect the dark god to join the McGuffin and a virgin sacrifice in the same ritual.

After getting the McGuffin and fighting off the queen’s army, the chick escapes, so that the first stage of the ritual happens. Conan saves the chick from being sacrificed and vanquishes the deformed godlike creature from the black lagoon.

The chick grows into queenhood, and invites all of the party into her government. Conan is invited to be her consort, but he refuses and rides into the sunset. Sequel hook ensues.


This is my place for ramblings about sequences of images that exploit the human visual limitation know as persistence of vision.

Ephemera of Vision