Secretary
Fifty Shades of Grey, if Anastasia was mentally ill, and there was another inept suitor. The lawyer is called Gray! Absolute insanity, this was allegedly based on a book, must be absolute smut.
Our protagonist is a woman-child, so mentally ill from growing in a broken home that she cuts herself since a teenager, and was checked into a mental hospital.
She comes back home, and on the first day, her dad gets drunk, so she breaks out the scissors and hurts herself.
To take her mind off things and attempt to integrate in the real world, she takes a typing course and aces it. Then she finds a lawyer is hiring typists, she gets the job.
When she gets there for the interview, the old secretary is leaving a trashed office. That job interview is filled with private, even intimate questions, and it gets worse from there.
You guessed it, the boss is a S&M practitioner, and during working hours, as his wife looks too milquetoast for kink. Our protagonist is literally ecstatic, she loved bending over a secretary and being smacked in the ass until bruises show up. But after this liaison, he demures. She teases him most incredibly, but he doesn’t put out, so she needs to jerk off in the bathroom right away.
She already applied many “manual overrides” in the comfort of her own company, with a big framed photo of her “boyfriend”.
Yes, I forgot to tell, she has a prospecting boyfriend, a boring-ass child like her. When they are making out in the room, she wants to be spanked, but the guy presents a condom. She relents, but remains sexually frustrated, while her partner squeals like a pig, doing all the job himself.
Eventually, when the boss is at his lowest mood, he calls her to the office, requests the same position, and she is back to happiness, but he simply jerks himself to completion on her back. It’s all over between them.
After a while, the idiot guy proposes, and she accepts, but flees to the bossman, requesting a spanking. It is not attended even when the remains at his desk for days, pissing herself in the wedding dress, waiting for not her fiancée. She literally sends him away.
After a while, the bossman clicks and fetches her, they marry outside the church, and besides fucking against a tree, they do more kink at home. The end, no notes.
The voiceover includes:
I felt something growing inside Mr. Grey. An intimate tendril creeping from one his darker areas.
Bitch, is this a dick joke? What kind of shit is this?
Poor Spader was typecast as the bizarre sexual deviant, probably on account of Crash. Maggie Gyllenhaal was just a very young girl trying to make it.
Can’t believe Angelo freaking Badalamenti wrote the score for this. Sound-wise, there is a “I Will Survive” cover by Cake, absolutely bizarre, almost spoken word.
This is my place for ramblings about sequences of images that exploit the human visual limitation know as persistence of vision.