Archive for March 2020

16 posts from 02 to 31 March 2020.

  • Arrival

    Confucian aliens arrive to koan us into nirvana. Timeless Knowledge is Bliss.

  • Black Mama White Mama

    A bizarre mix of risqué soft core T&A, long and drawn out shootouts, and Reaganist politics. Even weirder is the Philippines setting with cowboys and loads of country music. It’s like a Jackie Chan film without the good parts.

  • The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 1

    The sub-rosa raises above the roses. The Mao Tse-Tung followers assemble in the ruins of a nuked District 13.

  • The Hunger Games: Catching Fire

    The rabble demands panem et circes. They can eat brioche, but plenty of circes to go around. The emperor tries to kill two mockingjays with one arrow by having the old tributes fight to the death, again. Our heroes falls from a cliffhanger unto another.

  • Push

    Push, push, give me yeyo… Baby’s first X-Men. Ends with a sequel hook, just to crap all over the already mediocre plot. Did not see that coming…

  • The Hunger Games

    How ironic that this title leads to a resolution is where the protagonists do not eat something. Also, a film for “kids” featuring literal bloodbaths.

  • Sleepwalk

    Filipe Melo does an Americana short. It deals with the fact that the death penalty is as American as apple pie.

  • Rango

    Fuggedaboutit, Johnny. It’s Vegas with no name. Yup, it’s a film noir disguised as a Western, and vice versa.

  • The Shallows

    127 Hours of Jaws.

  • Drive Angry

    A metal re-imagining of Ghost Rider, without paying the royalties. Metal to the core, y’all are not metal enough for this.

  • The Wolf Hour

    Daugther of Sam. Naomi Watts in an apartment being the self-destructive writer. Good prevails, somehow. Not much to do with the similarly named Bergman film.

  • The China Syndrome

    Pretty face reporter and her activist cameraman accidentally runs into a major accident at a “nukular” power plant, followed by a cover up, the classic money trumps safety. She is brushed aside, since her brains were not why she’s there, while the cameraman is just an independent contractor.

  • Network

    Mentally unstable news anchor talks smack on live TV. Self-Destructing behaviour ensues. Released in 1976. Damn.

  • Sahara

    Uncharted: Matt’s Deception. The reason why there’s no Uncharted film (yet) is because this exists.

  • Mom and Dad

    Brian seems to be bad part of Neveldine/Taylor. This is execrable bullshit.

  • Jack the Giant Slayer

    I’m Jack’s complete lack of pacing. It’s as if someone saw The Hobbit and though: we should have more battle scenes.