Archive for Release Year: 1997

15 posts from 08 April 2021 to 08 July 2017.

  • Princess Mononoke

    A gripping tale of a feral ecoterrorist raised by wolves that discover what you hu-mans call “emotions”.

  • Hercules

    A Trojan horse. A tragedy. They lost their marbles. All-the-gory caved in. The best part: none. Ironically, one of the worst classics.

  • Mimic

    Yet another horror film about man-sized bugs with humanoid faces eating people.

  • Cube

    High concept horror film without a budget. Focuses on the dynamics between characters. Blows Saw off the water.

  • The Fifth Element

    A supreme being. Perfect.

  • Mr. Magoo

    Painfully unfunny.

  • Men in Black

    The one with the Will Smith hip-hop song over the credits.

  • L.A. Confidential

    Old school film noir about corrupt cops in Los Angeles (as the name implies). A bit too clean for my taste. Nearly as good as Chinatown.

  • Tomorrow Never Dies

    The one with Michelle Yeoh. Vincent Price is Rupert Murdoch on steroids. Hired Ricky Jay to hack “SSL2 with 128 bits” links or something.

  • Deconstructing Harry

    Fucking hell, what a fucker the main character is. Fucks around so much he is dumped by all woman he dates and/or marries. The dipshit will bed everything that moves.

  • Perfect Blue

    The distillation of all fame-related works mixed with a psycho-thriller, and there’s even time for a story within a story.

  • Mortal Kombat Annihilation

    Complete and utter dross. Main Plot points are launched and abandoned from the start, alleged romance happens.

  • Money Talks

    Dayuum, ‘em popos be trippin’ after this OJ shit. This is a very funny buddy cop film without cops, but Chris Tucker overshadows everyone, always, and in every single scene. It’s his thing.

  • Donnie Brasco

    Fuggedaboutit. This is a semi-standard mobster film, but with a funnier script and massively talented cast.

  • Wag the Dog

    Starts of funny and lighthearted, ups the ante several times into ridiculousness, then the ugliness is apparent. It can’t decide if it’s serious or a farce.